Picture This

Let The Nesting Commence.....

2011-12-06T15:33:00.001-05:00

Picture this...

It is early on a chilly morning. You wake up and realize it is Saturday. Woo Hoo!!!! Then you look down at your obviously pregnant belly and gasp! I'M ONE WEEK AWAY FROM MY THIRD TRIMESTER!!!!!!!!!!!!

How did this happen so fast? I just got over the 1st trimester sickies and now I need to start getting things in order before this kid shows up. Crap....now I am having a Braxton Hicks contraction. Heartburn too? This kid is gonna kill me. Well, not really but I think all women who have been pregnant feel that way at some point. And most, not all, get that crazy OCD nesting urge at some point.

We make our lists, check them 100 times, inventory our kid stuff and/or tweak our registries. That is the process I am currently in. And really, we are in great shape. There will be one difference however this time around. We are going to cloth diaper. We started with the cloth diapers for our son when he was around 18 months or so. It is something I am believing more and more in for many reasons and the direction I plan to take for this soon to arrive baby.

If you are not familiar with cloth diapers, there are sooooooooo many different options out there. Not to mention, they have come a long way from what they were when we were growing up and disposables really were not an option. This is why I'm blessed to have my good friend Nicole. I call her my cloth diaper guru. She runs a cloth diaper business out of her home and is a fabulous teacher and resource.
http://clothconvert.com/

I have decided at this point to stock up on prefolds, snappi's, diaper covers and a few fitteds. I'm going to be trying out different brands and products and I will come back to report exactly what I have and how I plan to use them. Then, when baby comes late February or sometime in March, I'll be sure to report on what I like and what is/is not working for us.

I'm really excited about this. I don't hug trees. I eat meat and don't really buy into what we have been told about climate change and global warming. BUT.....I do believe we are to be as good of a steward of the planet as possible. This is one way to do that for our family. Not to mention, cloth diapers are super cute and they reduce the amount of chemicals that come in contact with your child. For me, that is a total win even when you consider an extra load of laundry 3 times per week.

Let the online holiday snowball fight end NOW!!!

2011-12-05T13:09:00.001-05:00

Picture this....it is a couple of days after back to school and already your local Walmart is filing away school supplies on the clearance racks and beginning to put out Halloween decorations and costumes. Each year, the Christian holiday wars begins at about this time. Halloween is pagan, satanic and EVIL!!!! If you dare carve a pumpkin, hang a skeleton, watch Harry Potter or say "trick or treat," you can kiss salvation goodbye as you can not POSSIBLY be a born again believer in Jesus Christ.

Sigh.....where to start. I suppose the answer would be simple if it were just a Halloween issue. But alas, soon after Halloween is Thanksgiving. How could Thanksgiving be controversial in the American Christian community? Ha! We Christians have a knack for, as I like to put it, Jesusifying EVERYTHING. Online communities get into debates on questions such as this one I stole off a FB board:

"If you don't accept the notion of a God who created you, loves you, wants a relationship with you, will forgive you, wants the best for you, provides, sustains, and gives you hope for the future and true peace and joy in this life. Then why celebrate THANKSGIVING? To whom are you thankful? Your lucky stars? I know i'm preaching to the choir here...but it mystifies me how people put so little thought into what they practice."

Does this attitude end with Thanksgiving? OF COURSE NOT! Why would it? We have the wonderful Christmas season to contend with. What? You don't believe me? It is after all the celebration of Jesus' birthday for goodness sake. Just take a look around again at the online Christian community. Christmas is a pagan holiday. It is sinful to celebrate it. Jesus wasn't even born in winter. Santa Clause is a demon and causes you to lie to your children. St. Nicholas was ok, but only if you are Catholic. Christmas trees are also a pagan symbol and should never be found in a Christian home. Blah Blah Blah.....

Like clockwork, every year, we have these same conversations. People give the same answers they did the year before and yet, the arguments continue on all sides of the equation with equal gusto. Of course, then we add in those who are not professing Christians.

AHHHHH...my.head.is.going.to.explode.

Let's start with the basics about Christmas that everyone should be able to agree on. Nobody knows the exact birthday of Jesus Christ. The day we celebrate Christmas now is based off an ancient pagan celebration that recognized the winter solstice and the return of longer days. Christmas is one of the three best times in the Christian calender, back to school and Easter are the other two, when seekers are most open to hearing the Gospel story. In most societies that celebrate Christmas, it is more a cultural holiday and not a faith based one regardless of the CHRISTmas name.

My solution? It is a simple one, are you ready? No matter what your faith beliefs are or are not, you get to choose what you believe and how you will act based on those beliefs. So, if you feel Christmas is pagan and Harry Potter and Christmas trees are evil, then don't celebrate Christmas or read/watch Harry Potter. If you are a Christian believer and grew up with a Christmas tree and want one for your family now, enjoy the holiday and festive atmosphere that a beautiful blinking light tree will provide for you in your home. If you are in the Charlie Brown camp and feel Christmas is too commercial, act accordingly.

We all have different convictions, even if some of us have the same basic faith beliefs. How about we choose to love our neighbors and our differences, and celebrate or not celebrate a specific holiday or such according to our personal convictions and leave it at that? Why do we worry so very much about other people and take their choices as an attack on ours?

With that, I'll be off to bake some cookies for our upcoming Christmas open houses. I may even turn on some evil Christmas music and....don't fall off your chair....our pagan Christmas tree.

Falalalala, lala, la, la........

The World Does Not Revolve Around Sharon

2011-07-24T13:28:00.002-05:00

Picture this.... It is 8:00 am on Sunday morning. Most people are sleeping, but not you. You wake up, take a shower, throw down some fast breakfast and go to....CHURCH? You walk in, feel joy as you enter a beautiful sanctuary and see friendly and familiar faces. You hug and laugh and even on a rare occasion, cry. It is wonderful. Then you pick up the bulletin.

Introit ... call to worship .... hymn .... passing the peace .... announcements ..... prayer .... hymn .... psalter ..... offertory .... doxology ..... sermon .... hymn .... benediction .... hymmmnnnn ...... hyzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.....................

Oh, it's over? You ask yourself, was I really drooling? Shew, my hour this week is done. Score!

I grew up in a Methodist church which held VERY liturgical worship services. What I termed, BORING snooze fest; only good for playing games, writing notes to your neighbor or thinking about what you plan to do for the rest of the day. And, as time went on, I really grew to hate them. So much so that when I eventually left that church, I went to a non-denominational contemporary mega church. And, I loved it. LOVED IT! The freedom to try new things and not get stuck in a silly routine which only made sense to people from 200 years ago did not appeal to me. And drums! Drums in church!!!! Rock on!

But, as is known to happen when we belong to God, He often has other plans for us. Not only did God move me from that church, He moved me from that time zone. I now find myself married to a wonderful man of God, who on August 1st will be starting a brand new career as a pastor in the United Methodist Church. A long awaited career that has been over 15 years in the making. And, have you guessed it, his (and the churches) first preference for worship? Liturgical. Ugh. Are you KIDDING me God?

This morning, I felt convicted during worship. Here I am, pouting and throwing an inward temper tantrum because I don't enjoy this particular style of worship. And with that, I am missing the point about corporate worship in general. It isn't about Sharon. It isn't about any specific style of music or how prayers or said or what specific songs are played nor on what instruments. It is about coming together to worship and praise God as a community. It is ALL about God, and only God.

So, will I enjoy liturgical services from this point on? Probably not. But it does not matter. I will worship with joy and thanksgiving anyhow. Period. Why bother? Because being a born again Christian requires discipline and is a reminder that Earth simply does not revolve around me. And like I think most of us, that is a wise reminder and kick we often need as human beings.

Crunchy Mama - Cloth Diapers

2011-07-11T12:35:00.005-05:00

Picture this....

It is 3:30 in the morning. Your infant informs you it is time to get up and feed him and change his diaper. So, you get him something to drink and snack on. When that is done and sleepiness ensues, you go in for the diaper change. As you are removing those fancy disposable diapers, the smell of concentrated urine combined with the perfumes and plastic in the diaper hits you like a brick; only to be multiplied by thousands when you open that diaper pail to throw it and the wipes away. EWWWWWWWWWW..... I won't throw up, I won't throw up.....

As convenient as disposables are, they smell. At least they do on my son. So, my wonderful friend Nicole introduced me to the world of cloth diapers. I'm not going to lie, it took some convincing. But, once I got up the nerve, I immediately fell in love.

Did you know there are fabulous and easy options that do not include folding or pins? Washing them is no big deal. Now that I have figured out the right mix of detergent and such, it is a breeze and the diapers DO NOT smell after many uses. Once I learned and accepted that less is more in regards to detergent, we were on our way. The best part? They do not stink like disposables when they are waiting to be washed.

Lil' D is a heavy wetter. That kid drinks a lot of milk and water. So, we do have to watch that his cloth diapers do not get so wet that they leak through the outer PUL layer. Especially at night. He pretty much sleeps all night long. So normally, even with a disposable he is wet on the outside in the morning.

I tried several different kinds of cloth diapers to figure out what combo of diaper and insert will work best. And, thanks again to wonderful Nicole, we eventually tried the Fuzzibunz (FB's) Hemp One Size diapers.

As you can see, they are not in super fashionable colors. I guess to hang with the "green" look, they are a natural color. And, they only have one insert instead of the two that FB's normally come with. I will admit, I was worried at first. Is Hemp really that much more absorbent and will it really hold on to as much or more fluid than two of the thicker, cotton inserts?

YES YES YES!!!!!

In full disclosure, Lil' D will still wet through them for an entire night's wear. However, they are more comfortable since they are only stuffed with one instead of two inserts. They still wash up great and the part of the diaper that is next to his skin is still super soft cotton.

It is a win/win for all. These FB's Hemp One Size diapers rock! With realistic expectations for what cloth diapers provide in terms of waterproofing, I don't think you will be disappointed if you tried them. And, Lil' D's clothes fit much better under them because they are not as bulky as the cotton inserts.

Want more information on cloth diapers? Check out http://clothconvert.com/ Nicole would love the opportunity to help you figure out the best options for your family.

The Difference A Month Can Make

2011-07-04T21:19:00.002-05:00

Picture this.....

...you own a house and property located 5 miles from the Missouri River. 5 miles should be far enough away to keep you high and dry in the case of flooding, right? Well, most years, the answer to that question is yes. This year however, record rain runoff, huge snow caps that are melting slowly, untested levees at record level flooding and potential mismanagement of dams up north have changed the scenario.

Here is a video we took less than a month ago.

The video starts off as we are heading east over the Hwy 2 bridge from Nebraska City, NE towards the I-29 interchange. Today, the bridge and the Hwy and the Interstate are closed and covered with water. The river was just too much for an earthen levee about 2 miles north of this area. All the buildings you see in the second half of the video? Well, the unprotected ones have about 4-5 feet of water in them at this point.

The water is not forcasted to fully recede until September or October. This kind of flooding is happening all over the area and up and down the Missouri River. Omaha for instance is fighting hard to keep it's airport dry as well.

**Don't worry mom. All will be well by the time you fly in come October.

Water is an interesting substance. We need it to live. And too much of it can destroy and even kill. I suppose my grandmother was right, everything in moderation. Too bad we can't tell the river that.

Succession Planting

2011-06-17T19:43:00.004-05:00

Have you ever thought you knew all you needed to know about a subject, just to figure out in the midst of it that you still have much to learn?

Picture this...

It is February and you are in the midst of a cold spell. Feeling the need to do SOMETHING warm weather related, you begin to collect seeds and supplies so that you can begin to start some vegetables indoors that you will be able to plant when warm weather finally arrives. You read directions, 3 books and 10 websites about how to start them correctly.

Finally, a few days later, you see the first few shoots. So exciting! Green!!!!! Oh how you missed seeing GREEN! Shortly, the small shoots develop into seedlings and the countdown to spring begins. Being in Zone 5, May 15th is the no frost date. That is a long time to keep seedlings alive and thriving.

The day comes and you can finally harden off the plants and plant them in the garden. You water and fertilize. Then, well, they die. THEY DIE! Not all of them. But sheesh!

Fast forward to June 17th. I have peppers that are starting to look alive, lettuce that is also trying. Tomatoes that I don't think are going to make it. What's growing well? The bush beans, squash, broccoli and swiss chard are doing very well. They of course were plants where the seeds were sewn directly into the soil outside. Thankfully, I'll have SOMETHING to show for my 2011 garden adventure. It's a good thing we have wonderful farmer's markets in the area as well as a few orchards where you can pick your own fruits while also offering veggies.

At this point, I'm already starting to plan for next year. I'd love to build some raised beds for my veggies and herbs. However, I don't know that I'll get around to it. The yard is almost tamed, but this fall I will still be busy tilling and getting grass planted and started. I'll have to see how things look in the spring. What I have figured out is:

Considering the poor soil condition this year due to the vast amount of weeds competing for soil nutrients, I am going to have to get some great compost and till it into the garden this fall and again in spring.

I will most likely NOT start tomatoes from seed next year. I'll simply buy good heirloom plants from the nursery and call it a day. I did that with the broccoli and it was a great decision.

I need to fertilize the rhubarb in the fall to help insure a better early harvest next spring.

Once I start the garden next year, I am going to have to be on weed patrol pretty much every other day to stay on top of it.

So, now it is time for you to share. What gardening lessons have you learned that the rest of us can learn from?

Spring Has Sprung!!!

2011-03-07T15:00:00.003-05:00

If it were not so misty and drizzly outside today, I would take some pictures of my garden coming to life. I'm so excited I can barely stand it! So instead, today I did my first "planting" and also set up my seed starting nursery in the basement. Bring on Spring....I'm soooooooo ready!

Here is my brand new blueberry plant! Derrek loves blueberries so much, so why not grow them? We also have strawberries, raspberries, blackberries and gooseberries in the yard.

It may not look like much....but there is life and there will be berries! And all for a $5.00 plant.

The work bench was already here when we moved in. I'm sure the prior owners used it for seed starting since they so kindly left me tons of flats. During the week of March 20th, I'll start my first seeds here. I have a heating mat to make the environment ideal for growing temperature and have a plant UV lamp to provide the light.

Now all that is left to do is decide what exactly I am going to grow!

Week 2 Pantry Challenge

2011-03-07T11:41:00.002-05:00

I'm not going to lie, this challenge is harder than I thought it was going to be. Especially the $40/month budget. This week our purchases were:

1 lb Turkey lunch meat $2.15
4 fresh apples 1.91
5 bananas .88
blueberries 2.50
mushrooms 1.09
pineapple 1.99
5 naval oranges 1.08
1 gallon skim milk 3.49
1 gallon whole milk 3.49

Total week 2 purchases........$18.58

If I add last weeks purchases, we end with a total for 2 weeks of......$22.37 That means I'm $2.37 over my budget so far. I think I can make it up this week. I still have fruit left over from last week and I still have plenty of everything else I should need.

My meals this week included:

Curry Baked Chicken
Grilled Salmon
Pasta salad
Broiled Steaks with a teryiaki marinade
Sandwiches for lunch
cereal or eggs with fruit for breakfast

I do have to admit, my normal freezer (not the deep freeze) is becoming more and more empty. Like I said before, this is going to become more and more interesting as time goes on.

Couch to 5K...Again

2011-03-01T15:11:00.002-05:00

When Ray was home from leave, I expressed an interest in starting a jogging or running routine. It is something he has to do for the National Guard, and I thought it could be something fun and healthy for us to do together as a family. So, while he is back in Iraq and finishing his deployment, I have begun a couch to 5K program.

Many thoughts came to my mind today as Derrek and I started out. The first, even though we have a Baby Jogger brand stroller, it is NOT a jogging stroller. Gonna have to keep my eye out for a real one. Second, I'm REALLY much more out of shape than I thought. The particular program I'm using starts off with intervals of 60 seconds of running and 90 seconds of walking. On a treadmill, it would have been fine. Considering that every time I started the running interval, I was going up hill, well.... Let's just say I may be doing this first week of the program for two or three weeks before I move on to week two. Hills will help make me fitter, faster. Right?

I was pretty discouraged about how much I have let myself go in terms of fitness over the winter. But, there are good things too. I feel GREAT now after the exercise. We got outside for a while and Derrek is taking a nice long nap. So, while I feel like I'm starting from way behind in this, I know my body will adjust quickly and it will be better and better as I move forward.

Assuming nothing crazy happens, Ray and I have agreed to run the 5K race during Germanfest in our town on July 11. With the ipod charged, program downloaded, good weather on the doorstep and a race as my goal, I am on my way!

Week 1 Results

2011-02-21T23:03:00.002-05:00

Meals:

This week was easy, I must admit. Although, I do love to grocery shop. So, staying out of the store was hard. I did go in to buy a local newspaper on Wednesday and that was the only thing we left the store with. I'm learning. It is kind of odd to call this Spring Cleaning anymore considering it has been cold and snowy the second half of this week. That's just life I suppose. Warmer weather will arrive again in a few days.

This week or big meals were:

Meatloaf. Sides included home made mashed potatoes and broccoli.

Baked Chicken and Rice with veggies (took 2 days including 3 meals to finish this one off).

Baked pork steaks. Sides included baked sweet potato and frozen California veggie mix.

Lunches consisted of a sandwich of some sort, fruit and a dairy serving. Breakfasts were basic.

Purchases:

Gallon Milk $3.79

Yup...that's it! Not too bad since we have $10 per week budget.

I will post any recipes you may want. You just need to ask for them. If you want them all, I'll try to post them through the week.

Week 2 starts tomorrow. I'm meal planning now and will be headed to the grocery store today.

Week 1 - Menus

2011-02-21T19:17:00.002-05:00

At this point, I'm not being super specific with my meal planning and menus. We have enough food and incredible amounts of spices and seasonings in the house that I can sort of make it up as I go. It feeds my need to be spontaneous I suppose.

We have plenty of the following items in the house for breakfast:

-cereal
-oatmeal
-eggs
-bread for toast (I make my own bread)
-yogurt
-granola

As you can see, there is really no reason to "plan" breakfasts. At least for right now. Lunch will get tricky after this week. Right now I have some lunch meat, tuna and other items. Next week I may need to start getting a little more creative. I also LOVE to eat dinner leftovers for lunch.

Dinners for this week? I have thawing in the fridge:

-chicken thighs (6)
-pork steaks (3)
-2 lbs of ground beef from which I plan to make meatloaf
-leftover beef roast including potatoes and carrots

There is one issue I have not yet addressed, eating out. My $40/month ($10/week average) budget is for actual groceries/toiletries/cleaning supplies. My goal for eating out is once per week. Considering we ate out yesterday (Ray's last full day in Nebraska before leaving to finish his deployment) and this morning, we are done until next week.

How will week 1 turn out? Wait to see!!!!!!

Spring Cleaning

2011-02-18T21:03:00.002-05:00

The groundhog said spring was coming early. Woo Hoo!!!!! I can't complain as this winter has been mild compared to other Nebraskan winters and we did not get much snow at all. We still had 4 or 5 foot drifts in the back yard this time last year. At this time, there is NO SNOW in our yard at all.

With the warmer weather comes time to open the windows and do some deep cleaning in our home. While yes, I have shampooed the carpets already and have washed the outside of some windows, my spring cleaning is going to take another form this year. Our pantry!!!!!

That's right. Our collective pantry has more food stored for our family than I believe we would need for 4 months. However, I'm going to go with a conservative number and say 2 months. Learning to shop smart with sales and coupons has allowed our family to accumulate food and toiletries and cleaning supplies without keeping track of what we already had. I went a bit overboard to say the least. The bottom line? We have a major surplus! With this in mind, it is time for a new challenge for me and my homemaking skills.....

Spring Pantry Challenge

Beginning this week, 2/20/2010, I will be creating our weekly menu plans with only the food we have in the house. There will be some exceptions as things such as fresh produce and milk will be needed. I will spend no more than $40 per month on any sort of food, toiletry or house care needs. I'll post my weekly meal plans here on my blog as well as post any item I purchase during that week. Maybe even some of the interesting recipes I will no doubt be creating during this period.

Do you think I can do it? Take a look at my collective home "pantry" and tell me what you think!

Baked Macaroni And Cheese

2011-02-12T19:59:00.002-05:00

I tried this new recipe tonight. And oh-la-la....super yummy!!!!! Just thought I would share it with you....

1-1/4 cups whole wheat macaroni
water
2 eggs
1/2 cup part-skim or nonfat cottage cheese
1/2 cup skim milk
1/8 tsp paprika
1/4 tsp black pepper
1/2 tsp salt (optional)
1 cup part-skim or low-fat cheddar cheese, shredded
paprika for garnish
nonstick cooking spray

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Bring saucepan of water to a boil; add macaroni and boil until tender.

Combine eggs, cottage cheese, milk, paprika, pepper and salt in a blender and process until smooth.

Drain macaroni; place one-third of macaroni in the bottom of a 1 quart (I used a 1.5 quart) baking dish coated with nonstick cooking spray (I used olive oil). Sprinkle with one third of cheddar cheese. Repeat layers of pasta and cheese two more times. Pour blended mixture on top. Sprinkle with additional paprika for garnish.

Bake for 40 minutes. Makes 6 servings.
1/2 cup serving = 1 protein and 1 complex carbohydrate

First Travel Day....Done

2011-01-06T20:47:00.002-05:00

It was a beautiful travel day, for most of the day. It was sunny and felt warm for the season. We were making great time. And then, we hit Columbus, OH. Holy Snow! There were accidents everywhere so we decided to call it quits earlier than we had planned to get a hotel and relax. Heavy snow and slowly creeping traffic just do not mix.

Nighty night world....!!!! Day 2 of our trip home will start early.

Song of the day....

2011-01-05T20:11:00.002-05:00

My bags are packed, I'm ready to go...........

Except, we aren't leaving on a jet plane. Bright and early tomorrow, my mom, son, dog and I will be

....on the road again.....and, on our way back to Nebraska. Spending the holidays here was fabulous. And yet, I am super excited to get home. Not sure yet which route we will take. It all depends on which way the car goes I suppose.

Ack!

2011-01-04T23:19:00.002-05:00

It is close to midnight and I almost forgot to blog!!!

Today I went to visit my sister in the hospital. She is doing well, thanks to wonderful pain meds they have been giving her ;-) The point of mentioning the visit however is to write about the hospital she is in. The building? Brand new. 3 weeks old actually. And it is beautiful. In fact, when walking in you would never know you were in a hospital. It looks like a cosmopolitan beautiful hotel lobby. HUGE lobby. Off the lobby is a chapel. It is beyond peaceful and beautiful with lots of different colored glass. The wall as well as the large winding staircase in the lobby are made of the same marble that the wailing wall in Jerusalem is made of. Quarried from the same place. And this of course is just the main floor.

The place is gorgeous, I can not tell a lie. But, is it necessary? This hospital addition almost didn't happen due to budget issues. It was built during one of the most prevalent recessions in American history. How much more could they have done if they had used locally quarried stone? Or glass? Are the larger flat screen tv's in the hotel like private rooms helpful in a person's recovery?

I have mixed feelings. I understand that the medical field has mutated to a competitive business. How can we get more customers? Oppps..... Patients? How can we recruit the best staff with the #1 Johns Hopkins just down the road? How do we make money? How do we give hospitals a new "feeling?" Warm and inviting instead of cold and sterile?

Do any of these things actually help patients recover? Are there better outcomes due to the Jerusalem marble? I personally don't think so. But, this hospital did do a good job with my sister. Her surgery was very successful and she is recovering well. They are taking very good care of her and she is as comfortable as you can possibly be in a hospital. I suppose that's all that matters.

Facebook is Evil

2011-01-03T22:24:00.002-05:00

I have one word....

....Cityville....

I actually really like it. It is a less complex version of SimCity. I have spent way too much time on there this evening. Good thing I was actually productive earlier today. Getting my mom's house clean and our stuff ready to pack back into the car. 2 days and a wake-up until we are on the road again.

On another note, my sister had surgery today. She came through well and is resting. We plan to go and visit her tomorrow. Any prayers you want to throw her way would be super appreciated. She will be out of commission for a bit.

And now, I have to check on my city. ;-)

Lazy Day...

2011-01-02T20:44:00.002-05:00

Wow...

Not sure why I am so tired, but I sure did rest a lot today. I guess we all have days like those, when you don't feel like getting out of bed. We did get some things accomplished. Took down the Christmas decorations, delivered food to my sister's house since she is having surgery tomorrow and will be out of commission for a bit. Even watched the Raven's game that was WAY too close for comfort. Football may yet give me a heart condition.

As I sit here, I find myself daydreaming of home. It is odd, having two homes. My childhood home here in Maryland and my current home in Nebraska. I suppose I'm blessed to have two places where I feel comfortable and loved. I do love being "home" in Maryland. And yet, I'm itching to get back to Nebraska and life as usual.

Then again, life has changed pretty constantly over the past 3 or 4 years. Is there REALLY any such thing as normal after all?

Significance With Numbers

2011-01-01T22:40:00.002-05:00

1/1/11.....interesting. During the first 12 years of the new century, people seem to add significance to numbers, or dates in this example, that are the same. People did everything short of take medications in order to not have their children on 6/6/06. 10/10/10 was the most popular date for weddings in 2010. Many of my friends on Facebook put today's date on their status updates. I wonder what is in store for later this year... 11/11/11.

Do these numbers really mean anything? Was a child destined to be Devil's spawn if they were born on a date that resembled 666? What does the number 10 mean anyhow? How does having them 3 times in a row make them lucky for wedded bliss?

Numbers can be significant. Certain ages are milestones in our culture. In the Bible, certain numbers show significance. 3, 6 and 7 are examples of those. Is there something to that? Perhaps. But I have a new number of significance for 2011. That number is 365.

One of my major struggles has been to actually finish something that I start. I get bored easily and I'm not super competitive. So this year, I plan to learn the art of diligence and finishing. I will blog something, even if just one word, each day of this year with only the exceptions of major illness, world take over of some sort or loss of internet connectivity. No themes, no quirky catches. Just me and my sometimes odd mind.

Cheers to a new year! I can't wait to see what you have in store 2011!!!!

Happy New Year

2010-12-31T18:28:00.003-05:00

I have learned a lot this year and I feel have also grown in maturity. Tough circumstances will do that. My husband has been gone either for training or his deployment for all of 2010 with the exception of about two and a half months. Of course, leaving me to pretty much take care of everything, including raising our beautiful baby boy, all by myself. We have a yard that outgrew us with all it's trees, flowers and weeds. Did I mention weeds? My mom broke her ankle and my grandmother died all about the same time. My Godfather's health is deteriorating even further as Alzheimer's grows closer to claiming his too short life.

It has been one of those years. But doesn't each year bring hardships? And don't we always find ways to make it through? I have come to the conclusion that bad or difficult things are going to happen. That is part of life. But, you know what else is part of life? Grace, mercy, laughter, happiness, joy, contentment and peace. It is all about what filter you look through. Am I going to look through the filter of happiness and contentment, or am I going to look through the filter of difficulty, pain and hurt?

This year, I learned to do the former. You see, I have been a witness to those who have chosen to live instead of wallow. I have been the recipient of more love and grace than I am probably deserving of. My cup runneth over as individuals and organizations chose to reach out and help us this year and how through all the hard things, love overcame. My husband has been gone while doing a very important job. But it caused us to appreciate every second we do have together and to learn to communicate on a deeper level. My mom broke her ankle and my grandmother died, but a week later we welcomed a new member to the family, my nephew's wife Erin, followed by their baby boy in the fall. And while there is no cure for my Godfather, we as a family have learned that life does go on, as does love.

I pray we all continue to learn the same lesson as 2011 approaches and goes by all too fast, just as each year seems to do. Enjoy each moment. Make the most of it. Choose to laugh until you cry instead of crying and forgetting to laugh.

Happy New Year!!!!!

Thanksgiving

2010-11-25T11:33:00.003-05:00

For a moment, I'm going to jump on the Thanksgiving bandwagon. Then I'm going to take that bandwagon and do some off-roading. I hope you will stick around for the ride.

Everyone during this week, every year in the USA, will take time to stop and give thanks for whatever it is we are thankful for. What am I thankful for? Firstly, I'm thankful for a God who loves me when, in my eyes, I can be unlovable more times than not. Next, I'm thankful for my husband and how he also loves me, appreciates me and who has the ability to make me also appreciate myself. I'm thankful that he is giving and that he works so hard, through some not so fun jobs, to provide for us and love our family in that way. I'm also so thankful for how he loves our son.

Speaking of Lil' D, I'm thankful that he is who he is. An amazingly smart and curious little boy who at 13 months found those little feet of his and has not stopped walking since. Having him in my life has changed how I see the world. It has changed my entire world, and I love him more and more each and every day.

Our family owns, what I think, is a very cool old home with a lot of character. Are there things I'd like to change about it? Of course. But still, I wake up in the morning, and I am in MY home. We have heat, air conditioning, food to eat and most modern convenience. It is a wonderful feeling.

The thankfulness does not stop there. While I'm not really thankful that my husband is deployed, I am thankful at the opportunity it gives to be able to spend Christmas and New Years with my family and friends back east. Every day I get more and more excited about it. With new family married and born into our little pack along with all the old stand-byes ;-) this holiday season promises to be very special indeed.

At this very moment, as I sit here and type this while Lil' D watches the Macy's Day Parade on tv and plays with our dog Ebony, I'm thankful that I don't have to cook dinner today. That blessing is bestowed on my in laws, Earl and Laura, of whom I am also thankful. They put up their Christmas tree for Derrek, so spending this day with them will be very fun, and very yummy.

Looks like I'm thankful for a lot. The trick though is to remember just how blessed I am every day and to appreciated the blessings, no matter how big or small that find their way to our families life.
The bandwagon off-road tour will have to wait until this evening. In the mean time, choose to be thankful and to love today. It really is a lot easier than the alternative.

Seasons Change

2010-10-14T18:08:00.003-05:00

I have been listening to a lot of radio lately. Baby D and I, along with the dog, took a road trip recently to Maryland to visit with family and friends. During that time, I also had my 15 year high school reunion and we celebrated, although 3 weeks early, Lil' D's 1 year birthday. It was a wonderful trip, with beautiful signs of autumn were everywhere.

During these radio shows, I heard a lot of comparing autumn to approaching the "winter of life." Apparently, the fall season reminds some people of winter, and thoughts about their life and legacy begin to fill their minds and hearts. Lots of shivering and dread along with it. We heard many stories about terrible times in people's lives. The purpose of these stories was to show how, after our 20/20 vision becomes clear, these experiences make us stronger, wiser and contribute to our life legacy. Or, if you have faith in God, how He brought you through and has the ability to create light from the darkest moments.

The big question that always follows these kinds of story lines is, "What will your legacy be?"

It is a loaded question. The more I thought about it, the more I realized that I don't think these radio show hosts and their guests are really seeing the big picture. In order to see it, you have to look at an entire year of seasons, or your entire life. Since we are all still alive, we really do not have the ability to do this. The people who remain after us will be the ones concerned about your legacy. I think it is kind of silly to spend time pondering it.

With this in mind, I have decided to write a blog series on the seasons and how people compare them to real life. However, it is important to remember that the season's are interconnected. One would not be possible without each of the the others. They are all not only important, but necessary. They all have wonderful parts and they all have challenges. Let's take a "whole picture" look together.

Spring means rebirth. It is the time where the weather warms, the sun stays out longer, animals wake from their winter slumber and trees and plants begin to come alive. Wonderful colors abound. Scents you have not smelled in months and the warm sun on your skin makes you feel alive. In rural areas, plows and seeders are oiled, gassed and put back to service as crops are planted. Many types of animals and livestock give birth.

That is the picture most people have of spring. I have that picture too, with one addition. Zyrtec. Holy hay fever Batman! My reality is that, without allergy medicine, I would not be able to enjoy all the good stuff about spring.

When using the season comparison to life, most people consider the spring of life to be childhood. When you are born and start your life. It is happy, joyous and exciting. Not only for the child, but for everyone around them. When raising a baby, you realized that this is a wonderful, beautiful individual person with so much potential. Then you have sleepless nights. Beyond nasty diapers. Tears. Teething. Bumps and bruises.

You see, a child can't learn the difference between hunger and thirst without experiencing them and quenching them. A child can not learn to walk without falling over and over again. A child can't learn to trust without someone being there to comfort and love on them when they are crying. A child can't learn to read unless they are read too. The beginning, or spring of life, is wonderful. But it is NOT only full of sunshine, roses and butterflies. There are allergies, tornadoes, rainy days and growing pains.

Spring is not possible without winter. Most plants need a season to be dormant. They have to "sleep" in order to biologically be able to bloom in the spring. They may bloom after an overly mild winter, but they are never EVER as beautiful and robust as they are after a nice cold and snowy winter with a gradual spring that follows.

In life, new life can not start without maturity and growth of two other individuals. Seeds can't grow if they don't die first. If their shell is not broken and the actual seed shed to fertile soil with access to water and sunlight. Perennials and bulbs that are planted in the fall and look like dead roots or dead masses of plant matter are in fact, not dead at all. They are full of life. They are full of the energy, DNA, food and protection that will allow the plant to grow as the weather warms.

I know many older people who spend their time thinking about their past. Contemplating their decisions; having regrets and a feeling that life is already over. And yet, young people spend their time dreaming about the future. What do they want to do? Where do they want to work? Going to school? Marriage? Kids?

Here is the thing folks....life is not over until life is over. And life begets more life. I challenge older people to take some time and look forward to your future. You have learned a lot in your life, share it! Live your life, every day of it, with JOY. Throw away those regrets because you can only learn from the past, not change it. Choose to be happy. Choose to feel love and joy. It is a choice, don't ever forget that.

For you youngin's, enjoy today. That means every moment, even when you are doing something you hate. You too can choose happiness and joy over hate, regret and dread. Don't worry about tomorrow or wish your young years away. Walk away from drama. It will take years off your life and increase cortisol levels in your body. It is not worth it. Dream about the future, but don't chisel anything in rock. God often has another plan for you. It is your spring in life, so share it. Spend time with people outside of your age group. Get to know the older people in your family and neighborhood. It will bring both of you joy.

Find a way to endure the tornadoes, take your allergy pills and enjoy spring! Live life. Love life, because it is a gift. And share it. Isn't that really the neatest part of a baby? Being able to love him or her and then share them with the world? And remember, spring is born out of winter.

Just for Fun

2010-09-02T10:17:00.005-05:00

Some ladies on a Christian message board to which I belong decided to take some before and after pictures to show how they look when they get up in the morning to when their "beauty routine" is complete.

Being the wife of deployed Army soldier and mother of a 10 month old does not lend a lot of time for taking care of myself. I'm lucky to get a shower before his afternoon nap some days. But now, I think it is time to start taking a little mommy time each day so I an start feeling a tad better about myself. Not to mention, my super wonderful husband and I are going to have a skype date later this morning. Looking nice for him couldn't hurt either.

I was not brave enough to do a "I just rolled out of bed" picture, so here I am after my shower:

I'm apparently different than most of those ladies so far because I do my hair first. This is after my hair is dried and my eyebrows have been tamed:

And finally, here I am after a little bit of makeup. Really, I don't do much. A little bit of foundation primer, copper eyeliner, mascara, highlighter under the brow and in the crook of my eye and lip gloss.

And, here I am! Hope Ray likes it. Then again, he is a man so probably won't even notice ;-) But our cyber date will be fun, regardless.

As The Clearing Begins....

2010-08-24T10:57:00.003-05:00

In honor of the long running "As the World Turns" which will soon be ending it's daytime soap opera tv run, I give you this blog entry.

The garden is complete. The line has been drawn in the Nebraskan soil and I have started clearing out everything. The goal is to have this part of the yard, as well as the outer beds between the sidewalk and street, cleared by the end of next week. We had a cold front and storms come through last night, so the weather will be perfect for Derrek and I to head outside.

The proof is in the picture, right? Here you go!

Before we get to the garden design, just a moment to enjoy the magic that happens already. Here are current blooming bellflower (blue), yellow coreopsis that resembles small rudbeckia, and white late blooming hostas.

Here you can see where the new border is. These stones were bordering the yard and sidewalk. They have been moved to make the new garden border and so I have easier access to the part of the yard that is being cleared. So far I have about ten feet cleared.

Another view of the new garden/lawn border.

On the patio area, I moved the table and chairs a bit to make room for Derrek's pack and play. Since his babysitter is back to school, Derrek will have to hang out in the yard with me. Glad the hot weather finally broke.

What a difference, eh? So much more work to do, but I'm enjoying it. There is just something about working outside and seeing the fruits of your labor so quickly that kicks me in the rear to keep going. I have already ordered some bulbs and perennials for fall planting. Oddly enough, with the exception of some very small paper whites, there are no daffodils nor tulips in the yard. There were no mums either, but I have already changed that. The yard should keep me busy though the fall and into winter.

I have some other big plans for the yard, but I'll wait until we clear our way to those parts of the yard before explaining them. Buying this house has been an interesting undertaking just in yard work alone. But it has been so worth it. Now, I need to hop off here, set up lil' D's pack an play outside, and get working!

On to the next project!

2010-08-13T17:28:00.005-05:00

Well, I suppose I mean the continued project of this mess of a yard. I'm not going to lie, I'm embarrassed at how much of a mess I have allowed it to become. However, there is light at the end of the tunnel!

We live on a corner lot and have a decent sized yard for living in town. And, the only lawn we have borders the street. The rest of the entire yard is garden; about 60% of which right now is actually Nebraskan jungle.

Here is the game plan:

1. Identify which parts of the yard will remain garden and what will be converted back to a lawn. DONE

2. Clear out weeds and other vegetation that should not be there from the garden areas. Mulch it and spray with herbicide all areas that NOTHING should grow. COMPLETED TOMORROW

3. Transplant plants that I want to keep from areas that are going to be grass and mowed.

4. Once the garden areas are complete, totally clear out, till and plant grass seed.

Now, there is a large portion of the back yard that is nothing but river rock. I believe there used to be a pond there at some point. That area will simply be sprayed with the strongest plant killer I can buy in order to keep it weedless. I'll deal with all of that next year.

Here is the front and side sitting area that is done so far:

Note.....There was very few fall flowering plants in the yard. So, I have planted mums that you can see here in the foreground. I did finally decide on shrubs and planted three spring flowering rhododendron in the back. Oddly enough, they have buds on them now. I'm not complaning.

If you look in the back part of the picture, you will see the area that will be planted as grass in the next month or so.

Now that the heat warning is over and the Baltimore like humidity has floated away with the cool front that stormed through earlier today, it is time to really get moving! Tomorrow, the area beyond the sitting area and it's bordering stone walkway will be cleared and a new stone border through the yard will be done. With that, I may even have time to start transplanting some of the flowers that will remain in the yard.

I promise to post before and after pictures. This yard has humbled me, but I am determined to keep part of the garden and make the rest more manageable. Besides, Derrek and Ebony need some grass to play on and I need a garden to get my hands dirty in.

Today is the day....

2010-05-20T12:17:00.003-05:00

May 20, 2010. It is the day that my husband officially returns to active duty in the Army National Guard. While he won't actually be leaving for another couple of days, it is still a sad day. We have known about this date for over a year. It is the day we thought would take forever to get here and yet, here it is.

It really is amazing how time flies. I sure hope the next year plus a month or two flies by as well. As I sit here, our almost 7 month old son is happy and playing in his jumparoo. And yet, every few minutes, I see him stop, look at the front door, say "Da Da Da Daddy," then go back to his play. He is so young and does not understand. But he knows something is up. I think he feels the anticipation and sadness is both Ray and myself.

This deployment will be good in some ways. Ray will be making some great money and will give him the opportunity to both take a much needed break from the job at the prison that he hates as well as get the groundwork ready for him to hopefully enter the Army Chaplain Corps.

On the other hand, it means that Ray and Derrek will miss out on each other for a year. A YEAR! When Ray comes back from Iraq, even for his 2 week R&R, he and our son will have to get to know each other all over again. As Derrek starts talking, and asking questions, how do I explain where his daddy is without crying? How do I explain that his daddy had to go, that it was not a choice, and that his daddy loves him sooooooooo much?

Day by day, hour by hour, minute by minute is how we are going to survive this next year. My prayer is that we will become a family that is more close and in love with each other and dependent on God because of this separation. Right now however, on May 20, 2010, it is hard to see past that bus which is getting ready to roll away with my husband in it.

4 Days And A Wake-Up

2010-05-17T15:10:00.006-05:00

And......my husband will be riding away on a bus to begin his deployment. This past week and a half has been full of good times and strong emotions regarding the upcoming separation of our family.

Mother's Day was fine. We went to church and then to my in-laws home for dinner and a visit. It really is fun to watch them enjoy our son so much. In a few short days our baby boy turns 7 months old. People always said the time would fly by and to try to not look ahead but enjoy each day. I have been taking that advice to heart and I'm so glad! He is beautiful, handsome, smart, funny and a blessing to be a mommy to.

We then left for a few days to go to a nearby state park for a little family R&R. We rented a small cabin for two nights. The best part? The fireplace. Nothing like letting my inner pyro out to play. It was cold, damp, rainy and stormy for the majority of the time but that did not stop us from enjoying each other and making memories.

We were able to get a little bit of hiking in on the first day. The park boasts of a "waterfall." Not exactly what I was expecting, but it was easy enough to explore being that the drop is maybe 5 feet. Baby Derrek did well on his first hike (and first diaper change out in the middle of the woods). I was able to do some dutch oven experimental type cooking in the cabin. Next time I think I'm going to use an actual iron dutch oven and not the kind you use on top of a stove. Gotta love just throwing stuff in a pot and letting it cook itself. I sooooooooo wish we had a wood burning fireplace here at home. I suppose that is just something we will have to look for whenever we look for our next home.

Speaking of our home, WEEDS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! On the next few sunny days, my yard is not going to know what hit it! Now, we just need a few sunny days and no more of this "global cooling" stuff. That's all I have to say about that.

I know, I'm a blog slacker....

2010-05-08T15:28:00.003-05:00

There are normally about 3 or 4 times a week that I think, wow, this would make a GREAT blog post. But, do I sit down to blog about it? It is clear that I don't. It is odd that I don't, simply because, I love to write. I suppose it is going to take a more concise effort to blog on a regular basis. No promises, but I am going to try ;-)

While it is nice to have people who follow your blog or comment, it really is not necessary. In a manner of speaking, this is an online journal of my day to day life. I'm setting a goal for myself to try and blog twice a week. If I can at least get that accomplished and make it a habit, that will be a big accomplishment for me.

Not only will blogging on a regular basis help me, but it will also hopefully be a help to my husband who will very soon be deploying to Iraq.

So, here it goes....!!!!! Next post......Mother's Day!

One week in......any surprises?

2010-01-07T01:16:00.001-05:00

Waking up each day with the prayer "Surprise me, God" takes some guts. I have always been of the opinion that a person should never ask a question that they don't really want to know the answer to. And, this prayer really could open up a can of worms I may regret later. But then again, I'm praying this prayer to the One that I should have no fear about. So, I hold my breath, and say it and go about my business...waiting for the surprises to roll in.

Nothing extra ordinary has happened this week. I'm in a huge organizational kick right now, so that and the normal upkeep and management of the home as well as being a wife and mommy has kept me busy. All the tons of snow outside and arctic frigid temperatures have pretty much kept me inside. And of course, it is snowing again. No surprises there.

Being organized makes me feel good. It makes me feel like my house is clean and inviting. There is no searching for items that I know I saw laying somewhere. There is no stress to find that one stupid little thing that I MUST have right now. Being organized allows me to be in control.

Being organized also shows me how much stuff we have. And, in reality, how much we have that is not necessary. Last night I stayed up way too late watching a show on The History Channel. I started watching about 2 minutes into it so I didn't catch the name, but the program followed a family through what would happen in the worst case scenario of a major flu pandemic that turns the entire world into a 3rd world country. No electricity, no oil, no running water, no antibiotics.....pretty much nothing but the shells of homes and the knowledge of those who are left behind and are not killed by the pandemic. And, the mass run for all the "stuff" we need or think we need.

There was one scene where this family of dad, mom and teenage boy finally get out of Los Angeles and make it to a small town. While there, some guys broke into the town stash of food, water and other supplies. They were shot on the spot...no questions asked. One of the commentators said that not many people today in industrialized countries think they could do something like that, killing a looter or turning people away who you know may die if you don't give them food or water. But, it is easy to be "nice" when you are comfortable. And we are very comfortable! As soon as that goes away, things will change. Survival will be your first priority and you will do things you don't think you may be able to do now. If you don't do them, you may die too.

This scenario has me thinking a lot. While I have started this 30 day prayer experiment, I also have joined in with a group of people who are reading through the Bible during this year. There is a lot in there that is hard to understand simply because life then and now is so very different. What was it like for Adam and Eve, when they were thrown out of the garden, to learn how to live off of the land? How did they learn about agriculture, shelter, clothing....all that stuff? What did they think as the seasons changed? How did they learn how to survive? What do I have in common with them and what can I learn from them?

I'm not sure and I probably won't know until I get to ask them and God in person. But, it is a lot easier now to picture how sin changed their lives, their comfort, their everything! They went from living simple lives in communion with God and His creation. I'm sure there was work they had to do, but it seems the garden was filled with food and everything they needed to live very well. That is until they ate from the tree of knowledge. It's funny how we all think the more knowledge we have, the better off we are. That was not the case for Adam and Eve. Sin is just as destructive today as it was when Adam and Eve ate from that tree but we are just too comfortable to always see and understand it.

Happy New Year!!!!

2009-12-31T20:50:00.003-05:00

I don't know about you, but the ringing in of the new year always makes me look back on the year ending and forward to the year ahead.

This past year has been a whirlwind! Getting settled into our new home, church and town. Getting pregnant and all the fun and not so fun stuff that goes along with that. Giving birth in a manner I had hoped I wouldn't have to. Recovering from the c-section and starting life with a new member of the family. While I never really ever wanted to experience pregnancy, I do love this little man very much. He was worth it. It is weird how he is a wiggle over two months old and yet it seems like he has been with us and a part of us forever. What a huge blessing!

Next year will be bitter sweet. As Derrek grows and learns and explores, Ray will be preparing to deploy to Iraq with his National Guard unit. Sometime in spring is when they expect to head out. With that, Derrek and I plan to spend some time back home in Maryland.

While it saddens me that Ray will be away, I'm grateful for his sacrifice. Yes, I'll be alone with Derrek and without much family close by, but Ray will not get the privilege to see Derrek grow and change every single day. We are going to have to be creative with keeping in touch. Hopefully, while difficult, the experience will bring us closer together as a family in the long run. It certainly has made us appreciate this time together before the deployment. We take no day for granted.

Now, if you look back at the first few posts of this blog, you will see that I did a month long experiment called "Surprise Me, God." It is based on a book by that name. This dude woke up every morning for a month and his only prayer was, "Surprise Me, God." The book itself is his journal of what happened. I really enjoyed it the first time I did it and I really do think the new year is a good time to do it again. While I did complete that month long experiment, I didn't journal or blog the whole thing. This time I intend to blog each day for a month my experiences.

Happy New Year To Everyone!!!!!!!!!!!! God bless you all!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

A snow bunny I am not!

2009-12-27T17:33:00.004-05:00

I promised some funny pictures of my trying to tame the great snowy back yard. And, after the Raven's loss, I needed to cool off after all that yelling at the television. I put Ray's snow suit on and outside I went!

Even from the start, it was pretty deep. For some reason our back yard is a prime place for all the snow to drift to. Probably because the house is higher and the yard slopes away from the house. Ray, by the way, is warm and toasty inside while taking these pictures. Sheesh!

I'm not kidding, this snow is deeper than my waist! I can't imagine how much potential snow we are going to get this year considering we are only 2 weeks into winter and we have had 2 blizzards so far.

I did get my legs stuck. So I had to kick them straight out and up so that I ended up laying down on the snow. While I was there I figured I should go ahead and make a snow angel. It is still the Christmas season after all!

Yes, that is me standing on the seat of a bench. And, as I prepare to jump back into the snowy abyss......

....I get stuck AGAIN! I do have to say that playing in the snow was fun. Since rolling helped me get out before, I tried it again. The only problem this time? My arms got stuck too.

As you can see, I did eventually tame the Nebraskan Snowy Wild West Back Yard!!!!!!!! I should get a trophy or something. The weather man keeps saying we should be snow free for the next week. At this point, I'll believe it when I see it.

Thinking of Spring!

2009-12-27T01:34:00.005-05:00

....Twas the night before Christmas and all through the town, not a vehicle was moving except for the plow.....

....and on Christmas day....and on the day after Christmas.......

Who ordered all this snow???? I bet it was the farmers. Lots of snow in the winter with a slow melt is ideal for the wells and for the produce. But two blizzards in three weeks is a little much. Although, it is pretty. And, if I were a kid, this would be the perfect snowman, snow fort or igloo snow. Tomorrow, I plan to jump into the massive snow drift in our back yard. Don't worry, Ray plans to video it and take some pictures. I'll be sure to post them for you to laugh at......

Now for spring.....

I still have this big old yard of garden and I plan to not be here for a few months this summer. So, I need to make some decisions about what to do with it when I'm not here and the yard tends to week up fast. I suppose I'll need to hire someone to take come over once a week, mow what little grass is here and tend to the copious amounts of weeds and grasses that tend to choke out my flowers and other plants. I'll have to think about that and do some research.

However, it is going to be months, as you soon will see, until I see green again under all that white. So, in the mean time, I think I'm going to grow some herbs indoors. I always have a winter project and I think I'll make it my project for this winter.

2 Months Already?

2009-12-23T15:56:00.007-05:00

It is hard to believe that Derrek has been here for 2 months already. In reality, 2 months is a short time, but it really feels as if he has been here with us the whole time. I guess in a way he has since we moved into the house in mid December and I was pregnant by February! Here is Derrek's quick 2 month update:

Derrek was not a huge fan of bathtime at first. The pictures above are of his 3rd bath here at home and the first one he did not cry through. My mom came to visit for almost 2 weeks to help us out. It is a good thing because this hungry guy was wanting to eat every 1.5-2 hours. At this point we were still trying to get him back up to his birth weight. It didn't take too long because he eats all the time even now that he is on formula.

Here are some additional pictures from the past 2 months.

Of course, the most recent pictures are first. Above is Ray and Derrek at the Christmas party for Ray's MP unit. Below you will see that Ebony and Derrek are already good buddies. She lets us know when he is crying and will chase the cats away from him. Now she will lay on the floor next to his bouncer and lay her head by his feet.

Above was a picture I took here in the living room at 5 weeks. The blanket is one my Grandmother made. It made for the perfect backdrop for a picture of Derrek in his cammo outfit. And below you will see that Derrek already has the strength to hold up his bottle at 3 1/2 weeks.

Below is a picture I took while we were still in the hospital. Being a baby must be hard work! He was 4 days old here.

Finally, we wish everyone a very Merry Christmas! Even our little guy is in a Christmas state of mind!

Derrek's Birth Story

2009-12-23T15:46:00.003-05:00

Sorry this has taken so long but we have been a tad busy lately! If you get quezy at the thought of blood, bodily functions and gore and birth, reading a birth story containing a c-section may not be the best read for you!

On Wednesday evening, October 21st, I started to notice a kind of pattern to some back pain I was having. I also felt some contractions, but only like one an hour. Still, it got my attention enough to keep an eye on it. Not too long after that, my sister called. We were chatting about all kinds of stuff, and I mentioned around 6ish about the back pain and contractions. She stayed on the phone with me, and at 8:00 I started writing them down and she helped me with timing them.

My poor sister stayed on the phone with me until 10:30ish, when Ray got home from work. I also tracked down my friend Erin on facebook. I remembered her birth story and how she didn't realize she was in labor because the contractions were not textbook. I picked her brain a bit as well and decided that at the very least, when Ray got home, I was going to call the hospital and see what they said. At this point, contractions were about a minute or so in duration and about 10ish minutes apart.

Ray walked in the door from work, and I said to my sister, "thanks for staying on the phone with me." Ray gave me a funny look and said that was an odd comment. It was and odd comment and I informed him I had something very interesting to show him and to come over to the sofa with me. He did, and I handed him the contraction timing list. He got this very cute and very funny smile on his face. Oddly enough, he STILL has that look today...LOL!

I called the hospital and they suggested that since I had been drinking water constantly since 6ish, to come in and get checked. Ray got our stuff together, made sure the animals were good and off we went in the pouring rain to the hospital. Good thing it was rainy though....otherwise our normal 40 minute trip to the hospital may have been more like 20.

We arrived, they took me to a labor and delivery room and started the intake. I had to pee sooooooooooo bad, so she let me go. Oddly enough, there was some bloody show. First time I had seen it at all. I immediately went on monitoring. Remember when I said I had timed my contractions to be like 10ish minutes apart? In reality, they were 2-3 minutes apart and I was only physically feeling about a third of them. I was totally fascinated with the monitoring strip. After 30ish minutes, the nurse finally checked my cervix and it was only dialted 1 cm and was about 45% effaced. No big deal. They called my doctor and he said to not admit me yet, but hook me up to fluids and monitor for 90 minutes. Check my cervix again after that and call him back. They inserted the IV around 1:00ish am. They also did an unofficial ultrasound, and stubborne little Derrek was still in full on breech, but doing very well with the contractions.

Fast forward 90 minutes later.....by this time, contractions were 1-2 minutes apart, I was feeling every one and laying in bed hoovered!!! They checked me, and I was 85% effaced and "one and a wiggle" cm dilated. The nurse left the room to call my doc and give the update. She came back in dressed in surgical scrubs. "Dr. Gibbens said to have you ready in 30 minutes. You are having your baby within the hour."

Huh? WHAT?????

So, surgical prep started. I got poked by the lab gal, shaved, got to wear my uber fashionable surgical cap and was being talked to by anestesia on the way to the surgical room. Ray stayed in the labor and delivery room until after my spinal/epidural was put in and all was ready to go. They gave me a combo spinal/epidural. The spinal meds covered the surgery and right after. I kept in the epidural for pain relief for a little over 24 hours. I was more scared of the epi than I was of the surgery I think. That fear was misplaced. Once I relaxed, the epi/spinal went in like butter and I started feeling very little.

Ray came in and sat by my head and they put up what they call "the tent." Doctors started working, and while I felt them working, I did not feel any pain. Well, I didn't feel pain right away anyhow. Let me just say that anyone who says that women who get c-sections are cop outs or not real women or don't have real births have obviously never had a section. It does hurt! A lot! Not so much the birth part, but the repair part afterwards. I dealt with labor, although a short bout of it and then dealt with the section. I paid my dues!

Derrek was pulled out rear first.....appropriate for being a full breech baby and he cried right away. Being born at 37/5 was no problem for him. 6lbs, 11oz and 18.5 inches long. APGAR 8/9/9. He was full of vernix but beautiful with a ton of dark hair on his head. They showed him to me quickly, but then rushed him off to the warmer on the other side of the room. Ray went with him and the anesthesia gal stayed with me and talked me through it all.

Did I mention how much the repair part hurt???? She had given me all the meds she could at the moment including pitocin to help get that uterus shrinking back since I could not breastfeed right away as well as nausea meds. I am still amazed that I did not throw up on the table. That's how much it hurt. And, I have a pretty high pain tolerance. At the end, the doctor asked if I wanted staples or stitches. I told him whatever is faster. I wanted it to be over sooooooooooooooo much! At this point, Ray had Derrek all swaddled up and had brought him over to help me get my mind off the doctor's working. He was so sooooo cute. And, he was quiet. Besides some initial crying as he was pulled out and then maybe for about 4 minutes, we heard very little from him. He was just that content and wide awake too. I had to keep asking if he was still in the room.

I was rolled into a recovery room, and Ray, Derrek and I got to spend our first quality time together as a family. The nurse took some pictures of us at that time. After that, it was time to be moved as a family up to the maternity floor. Finally...!!! Some rest.

Oh how time flies....

2009-11-25T16:07:00.007-05:00

Everyone warned me that the pregnancy would fly by. I didn't believe them. At times, it felt like it would never end. Indeed though, it did end, on October 22, 2009. And, we welcomed into the world our wonderful little man, Derrek Nolan Underwood!

As you can see, I did end up having a c-section. I went into labor on the 21st, and when we went to the hospital, they determined the little bugger was still in a full breech position. We are all doing well now and recovering well. I'll be adding more updates as I go now that Derrek is sleeping longer during the night and Daddy and I are starting to feel a bit more human. I'll also post the full on birth story for those who like to read them.

Lots of updates......

2009-09-24T12:45:00.007-05:00

Ok, so it has been a while. But, I have been busy!!!!!!! That's my excuse and I'm sticking to it ;-)

Of course, we have had the beginnings of Football season. And, my Raven's are doing pretty well! Even Ebony is excited!

We are also getting stuff rolling in church as the Fall came storming in. Ray is teaching Adult Sunday School and I'm leading the same study in an evening group at our home. I am also leading the youth group.

As for the yard/garden? Well....ummmmm, yeah! The weeds got it. I think it is a Nebraskan conspiracy or something! I have been able to keep up with the front yard and a bit on the side. The rest? Not so much. Bending over to pull weeds just does not jive with having a growing baby in the belly. There is always next year. Not to mention, next year we are going to be turning a portion of the back yard BACK into a lawn instead of a garden full of flowers, cactus, weeds and rocks.

Oh yeah, and we have Derrick getting closer and closer to his arrival each day. I am due on November 7th, and so far we have had a healthy pregnancy. Let's pray that does not change. Many have asked about the final update and pictures of the completed nursery and my belly. Enjoy!!!!

New Belly Pic

2009-07-20T21:14:00.003-05:00

Well, ok....here it is! People have asked, and now I am delivering......

The picture is of Ray and I out and about at Rock Creek Station near Fairbury, NE. I'm a huge history buff, and the California/Oregon Trails as well as the Pony Express went right through here. You can even see some of the wagon ruts left. Not a lot of detail, but no doubts that I am 23 weeks pregnant in this picture! Thanks to my lovely sister for snapping this one... ;-)

It's Done!

2009-07-02T21:52:00.006-05:00

And now.....the long awaited announcement you have all been waiting for......

THE BABY'S ROOM IS DONE!!!!!!!!!

This is the room, as you may remember, was Pepto Pink when we moved in. Well, not anymore! Good thing too since it turns out that we are having a boy. The room is painted, the carpet is in, and the dresser is in the room. My mom and sister will be visiting next week. Therefore, we still have the twin bed in there and the crib is still in a box on the porch. When they leave, the bed will go upstairs and crib will come in.

Here are some pictures of Ray learning how to paint his first room:

And now...the finished product!!!!!!!

It has been a long process, but I'm so excited that it is over! We learned a lot about our home as well as to not expect anything to be square or even in a house that is over 100 years old. Now we have plenty of time to get everything ready for little Derrick to arrive around November 7, 2009!

Water Rescue At The Dog Park

2009-07-02T14:36:00.008-05:00

This past Monday, Ray and I decided to take our 50 lb puppy to the dog park in Lincoln. Ebony LOVES the dog park! She is a very well mannered, curious and social dog and she can practice all of that there.

Now, Ebony is a mix. We know she has lab and german shepherd in her. She has the webbed feet, tail and coat of fur that labs are known for. Her head, ears and personality however are all shepherd!

Back to the story. We got to the park and she explored and played for a bit. Then we ended up over at the creek and pond. She is a lab mix who is not so happy about being wet. She has webbed feet for goodness sake! So, this could not last for long. We tried to get her to go into the water and check it out, assuming that she would like it if she jumped in. No success! She would sniff the water, drink the water, but didn't even want her paws wet.

With that, we decided to take action. A dog with webbed feet should be swimming on a hot and sunny summer day. Ray took her around to the other side of the pond area, and bumped her into the water.

She fell into the water and immediately climbed out. But then, she seemed a bit curious. So, into the water she went again with a little help from Ray. And then it happened....Ebony froze. She did not fight the water, but she sat down and would not move or try to get out. At first we thought she was just getting used to the water. Then we realized she didn't know what to do and she was unsure about swimming in deeper water that she would have needed to go through in order to come out the other side toward us.

After about 15 minutes and her making no attempt to even really move around, it was time for a Ray style water rescue! He took off shoes and socks, and went in the water to bring her out.

And that fast, Ebony was again the happy and playful pup she always is, although very wet. She immediately started playing with another dog and running around.

We stayed for a while to let her play herself tired and to dry out a bit before getting back into the car. Next time we plan to take waterproof shoes or sandals, some towels and treats and see if we can get her to follow us into the water. It would be such a shame for those very cute webbed paws to go to waste!

Oh yeah, you did not see double. Ray and I are wearing matching t-shirts. Totally unplanned, but neither of us felt like changing that morning. No jokes please ;-)

One Step Closer

2009-06-25T23:09:00.004-05:00

Today was a good day. Yes, it was the day that Farrah Fawcett and Michael Jackson passed away. However, it is apparent that life does go on. We were able to have our 20 week ultrasound today and to witness just how new life grows.

For your viewing pleasure, let me introduce to you......Derrick Nolan Underwood! We can't wait to meet you!

Say goodbye to the pink!!!!

2009-06-14T00:04:00.005-05:00

When Ray and I first looked at the house we moved into, we knew right away that one of the bedrooms on the main floor was perfect for a nursery or kids room! The problem? It was painted pink. I mean REALLY PINK!

Even if we end up having girl, who would want to sleep in a room the color or Pepto Bismol? So, it is now painted a nice soothing and neutral color. We pulled up the old and ugly slate blue carpet hoping that the hard wood under it would be good. Surprise! It wasn't!

Not only was the horrible pink and white paint all over it, the hard wood as you can see did not even reach the wall on two sides! Ack! So, we changed plans and decided to cover it with laminate flooring. Not realizing (like a dummy) that the 100 year old hard wood was probably not level, we tried in vein to lay the floor. After a few days, we knew it was not happening without a lot more work. And, my pregnant body was not up to the task considering all the manual and physical stuff the rest of the house and the yard requires.

So, we ordered carpet. We are hoping to have it installed within the next couple of weeks. Once it is in and the room is decorated with cute baby things, I'll show more pics. But, that probably won't be until much later this summer.

Baby Update: He/She is moving like crazy! It is not really hard kicks or anything like that, but I feel a ton of movement, especially in the evenings. Our doctor's office is getting new ultrasound equipment installed on the day we were supposed to go in for the 20 week ultrasound. So, we have been rescheduled for later that week. Hopefully, we will be able to find out the sex of the baby. Considering that I have caught the "I must buy all cute baby things" flu, it may be a good thing if we are not able to find out! However, I REALLY REALLY REALLY want to know.

Yummy!

2009-05-29T19:53:00.004-05:00

Well, at this point my veggie plants are paid for. I harvested my first round of lettuce today, and Ray and I enjoyed it in a salad for lunch. It was very yummy and it was really neat to be able to go to the yard for food instead of to the grocery store!

By next week, I should have some berries to harvest too. In fact, I'll have enough of them for about 1000 pies by the end of the season! Maybe I'll try to sell some at the church farmer's market with the proceeds going to missions. Or, I'll process them and freeze them so I can bake in the winter.

Regardless, the yard and the veggies are coming along. So is my pregnant belly. No doubt I am pregnant now! Although I'm not brave enough for a full out naked belly picture, you will get the point.

Considering that I have not gained, but lost 15lbs since I stopped working, my doc said I may be lucky to gain 15lbs by the time all is said and done. But, it is totally normal considering I'm not eating out 2 or 3 times a day, sitting behind a desk for 10 hours a day and driving in the car for another 2 hours per day. And, I could stand to lose some weight anyhow.

Our next doctors appointment is on June 22 and they will do the 20 week ultrasound. Assuming the baby cooperates, we will be able to find out the gender, if we decide to do that. Still not 100% sold on letting the sex be a surprise up until the birth. I guess we will have to wait until that day to decide for sure. Either way, it will be a good day.

And now, both Ebony and myself need a walk. Catch ya later!

Memorial Day, 2009

2009-05-25T20:00:00.006-05:00

Well, the day is almost over and Ray and I have had a great one! We slept in, then worked together in getting some much needed house work done. We have lots to do over the next week to get ready for a furniture delivery on Thursday. However, the weather was beautiful and this afternoon we decided to cook out on the grill for the first time. The grill, by the way, was another perk of buying the house! Here are some pictures of Ray cooking dinner:

While he was cooking, I was enjoying the garden yard. It is so much fun because it changes every day. And, the veggies are doing GREAT!!!! In fact, I will be harvesting some lettuce tomorrow. The strawberries are also growing. We are going to have a ton of them. Good thing we really like them. I'll have to find some recipes for smoothies. That would be perfect for the summer. As for the flowers, here are some pictures for you to enjoy:

2009-05-25T11:08:00.003-05:00

In Flanders Fields

By: Lieutenant Colonel John McCrae, MD (1872-1918) Canadian Army

In Flanders Fields the poppies blow Between the crosses row on row, That mark our place; and in the sky The larks, still bravely singing, fly Scarce heard amid the guns below.

We are the Dead. Short days ago We lived, felt dawn, saw sunset glow, Loved and were loved, and now we lie In Flanders fields.

Take up our quarrel with the foe: To you from failing hands we throw The torch; be yours to hold it high. If ye break faith with us who die We shall not sleep, though poppies grow In Flanders fields.

According to the web site http://www.arlingtoncemetery.net/flanders.htm

McCrae's "In Flanders Fields" remains to this day one of the most memorable war poems ever written. It is a lasting legacy of the terrible battle in the Ypres salient in the spring of 1915. Here is the story of the making of that poem:
Although he had been a doctor for years and had served in the South African War, it was impossible to get used to the suffering, the screams, and the blood here, and Major John McCrae had seen and heard enough in his dressing station to last him a lifetime.
As a surgeon attached to the 1st Field Artillery Brigade, Major McCrae, who had joined the McGill faculty in 1900 after graduating from the University of Toronto, had spent seventeen days treating injured men -- Canadians, British, Indians, French, and Germans -- in the Ypres salient.
It had been an ordeal that he had hardly thought possible. McCrae later wrote of it:
"I wish I could embody on paper some of the varied sensations of that seventeen days... Seventeen days of Hades! At the end of the first day if anyone had told us we had to spend seventeen days there, we would have folded our hands and said it could not have been done."
One death particularly affected McCrae. A young friend and former student, Lieut. Alexis Helmer of Ottawa, had been killed by a shell burst on 2 May 1915. Lieutenant Helmer was buried later that day in the little cemetery outside McCrae's dressing station, and McCrae had performed the funeral ceremony in the absence of the chaplain.
The next day, sitting on the back of an ambulance parked near the dressing station beside the Canal de l'Yser, just a few hundred yards north of Ypres, McCrae vented his anguish by composing a poem. The major was no stranger to writing, having authored several medical texts besides dabbling in poetry.
In the nearby cemetery, McCrae could see the wild poppies that sprang up in the ditches in that part of Europe, and he spent twenty minutes of precious rest time scribbling fifteen lines of verse in a notebook.
A young soldier watched him write it. Cyril Allinson, a twenty-two year old sergeant-major, was delivering mail that day when he spotted McCrae. The major looked up as Allinson approached, then went on writing while the sergeant-major stood there quietly. "His face was very tired but calm as we wrote," Allinson recalled. "He looked around from time to time, his eyes straying to Helmer's grave."
When McCrae finished five minutes later, he took his mail from Allinson and, without saying a word, handed his pad to the young NCO. Allinson was moved by what he read:
"The poem was exactly an exact description of the scene in front of us both. He used the word blow in that line because the poppies actually were being blown that morning by a gentle east wind. It never occurred to me at that time that it would ever be published. It seemed to me just an exact description of the scene."
In fact, it was very nearly not published. Dissatisfied with it, McCrae tossed the poem away, but a fellow officer retrieved it and sent it to newspapers in England. The Spectator, in London, rejected it, but Punch published it on 8 December 1915.
Thanks to Mack Welford for reminding me of this great poem.

Thank you to all the men and women who serve in our Armed Forces! We appreciate your hard work, dedication and sacrifices!!!

Family Heirlooms

2009-05-23T19:30:00.005-05:00

Ray and I have been very fortunate. We have been able to buy a great starter house at a price that was a steal. We are expecting our first child. We have also been blessed in some of the "things" we have acquired. Included in this has been my grandmother's china. I finally got around to washing it and putting it into our china cabinet. I don't normally care about really fancy, expensive stuff. But this is a little different. It is a part of my families history that I will be able to continue sharing with others. Here are some pictures:

You probably saw some other heirlooms, both old and not so old. But, all of them tell a story of Ray's and my heritage, present and future. I can't wait to have someone come over and visit so we can use them!

Thank you Grandmom!!! I love you!!!

Veggies Anyone?

2009-05-14T09:19:00.004-05:00

All my veggies are now in the ground! Well, at least all of them that I have to plant for now. I still need to get a few tomato plants and clear one more corner of the little plot in the yard I am using.

I took the above picture to show you the process of clearing this area and getting it ready for veggies. The prior owners of the home had prepared this area for and planted several cactus. So, I had to remove all the river rocks (as you see on the right side of the picture), turn the earth to mix in the small layer of sand on top with the good soil underneath, and fertilize before planting the veggies. It is not a huge area, but enough that doing it pregnant tuckers me out after a while.

So far, we have planted:

Rhubarb
Iceberg lettuce
Red leaf lettuce
spinach
bell peppers
broccoli
zucchini
green beans

So, one corner left, then plant the tomatoes. Then all that is left is watering and watching my veggies grow! Oh yeah, then eating them up too!

Home and Garden...and a lot of work!

2009-05-13T15:46:00.004-05:00

As I mentioned before, our yard is not your normal yard. It is a garden. AN ENTIRE GARDEN! While I was working, I tried to explain this to my coworkers. I don't think they understood. One of them, Kelly, came to my house to get some rocks for her yard. She was shocked! She had no idea how big this "yard garden" really was.

Here are some pictures so you may have a better idea:

So what do you see? I see tons of plants, more rocks then one will ever need in a yard, and way too many weeds to keep up with. I have always loved to garden, and this yard is giving me my dream to have a huge one! While it is a lot of work, I'm enjoying it very much!

Right now domestically, I have 3 projects going:

1. Get the baby room painted and the floor done before furniture is delivered on May 28. (Ray is painting this weekend. Then I'm putting the laminate floor down next week)

2. Get the veggie garden plot ready (meaning getting rid of all the rocks and getting the soil ready) and get the rest of the veggies planted.

3. Keep up with normal maintenance in the yard.

Needless to say, #3 is the one that I have been slacking with the most. I think that once the baby's room is done and the veggies are in and growing, I'm only gonna take on one project at a time along with keeping up with the yard.

Life is busy, but is is fun and definitely not boring!

Holy Smokes....it is has been a long time!

2009-04-24T17:56:00.005-05:00

It is interesting how life changes over a few years. Since blogging here initially, I have joined facebook and Myspace to keep in touch with friends and family. I have done some blogging on there. However, I sort of like having a totally separate blog, just for me to rant, rave and ramble. I guess I'll have to just cut and paste everything onto myspace too. Why can't there be just one universal program that EVERYONE uses????

Just to catch you up on things in one paragraph, I met a dude online, his name is Ray. After a while of chatting and his returning home from deployment in Iraq, I moved to Omaha, NE to be closer to him. We were engaged in November 2008, married in August 2008, bought a house in December 2008 and found out late February 2009 that we are expecting our first child. Shew...ok.

Ray and I are finally REALLY getting settled into our new home. How long can you really call the home "new" after you buy it? I plan to say it until we are settled. So, 6 years from now it is totally possible that I will still be calling this house new. Funny how that works when the original part of the home is over 100 years old!

The house has 3 bedrooms, a great multi-purpose room upstairs and a fun porch/sun room on the front of the house. The things I LOVE about the house is the old country flair it still contains. Most of the beautiful and original (I think) woodwork is found throughout the house. The living room has 2 windows with leaded glass accents that throw every color of the rainbow into the room when the light hits them right. My other favorite part of the house? The yard!

This is no normal yard! In fact, the only grass that exists borders the street. Otherwise, it is a very well developed garden. Mind you, this is a corner lot. So, that includes the front, sides and entire back yard. Since I'm pregnant, I'm not going to be able to do as much this year as I would have liked in the yard. But, there is one area of the yard that had been dedicated to cactus, of all things. I took them out yesterday and that area will be my new veggie garden. In fact, I already transplanted some rhubarb that a very generous lady from church brought by.

I'll post some pictures in a few days. I'd go take some pics now but it seems a storm has blown up and they are calling for rain for the next few days. That means lots of flowers, right? Somehow, I don't think I'm going to have to look very far to see a ton.

3 Down, 40 To Go!

2006-04-26T11:43:00.000-05:00

Well, I have come up with 3 "things to do." Here is the list so far:

1. Buy a house

With the way housing prices are staying so inflated and with rising energy costs, I think the house deal may be a very long term goal. Perhaps it would be wiser to come up with a step by step plan towards this goal and use them as "things" for my list.

2. Find a new church

Ok, all I have to say is that it makes me very sad to see my church dying in the way that it is. I grew up there. The people in the church have helped me through so much in my life and I have spent so much time and energy there trying to help and starting ministries. But alas, all good things must come to an end and I fear that my church will be dead in a few years. Finding a new church home is my priortiy right now. I visited a brand new church this past Sunday and absolutely loved it! I do have to go to my old church this coming Sunday. But after that, I am going to go to the new one each Sunday.

3. Blog at least once a week

Ok, this one is going to be hardest for me. For any of you who know me, you are well aware that it is not often that I don't have something to say! When it comes to putting it down in writting though, it is much more difficult for me to keep up. I always have great ideas, but I also get bored very quickly. I'm hoping I will not get bored with this.

I will say goodbye for now and come back with a real blog entry. I just wanted to give an update to my last entry.....

What do you want to do?

2006-04-14T10:15:00.000-05:00

Seems like an innocent enough question, don't you think? I thought so too; that is until I tried to answer it.

You see, a friend and co-worker of mine has been hanging out on a web site called 43things.com. The premise behind the site is that it creates a community of people based on the things you want to do, see/visit or read. So after much proding, I created an account and logged in. The first thing it asked is..."What do you want to do?" I should have a ton of things to put there and coming up with a list of 43 things should not be difficult, right? WRONG!

I'm at a total blank. Everything that came to mind are things that other people want me to do. For example, finding a husband or finishing my BA degree are things my family and friends want me to do. They are not my dreams.

I don't think it is accurate to say that I don't have my own dreams. It is just that up to this point, I have accomplished pretty much everything that I wanted to. I have great family and friend relationships. I absolutley love my job. While my church leaves something to be desired, my faith is still very important in my life. I have traveled and am continuing to travel. I am also doing some recreational stuff, including the Raven's Marching Band and having season tickets to the Orioles.

So, what else do I want to do? What else do I want to accomplish? Learn? Travel to? I don't know. But, I will keep you up to date!

Driving 101

2006-02-17T12:09:00.000-05:00

Day 2 was a lot of fun! I woke up to my mom flipping out because her car was making a funny noise and I had to wake up and take her to work. I should mention, I am not a morning person!
But, by the time I got to work myself, I snapped out of my bad mood. The day was busy making the time go by fast. No surprises there!

It was not until I got home that my surprises started. Have you ever had one of those moments where God tells you something, and then confirms it for you? Well, that is what happened to me tonight.

I had just finished eating dinner when the phone rang. It was my 18 year old nephew Matthew. Gosh I love that kid!!!!! He is learning to drive and wanted to know if I could ride with him during his practice time. I said of course, come and pick me up. So, he and my sister pulled up a few minutes later and my sister crawled into the back seat to allow me to sit up front with Matt. We had a good time, and I was right there as he drove for the first time in both the city and on an interstate highway. He did so great and is very teachable.

While I loved being invited to tag along and being able to teach Matt all of what I know; the thing I loved the most was that both of them just simply wanted to be with me. And, I also loved spending time with them. With life being so busy for all of us, we do not get that opportunity to hang out and enjoy each other like we used to.

I'll tell you more about my sister and nephews later. But, the point I want to make here is that the only times I feel alive is when I am with the people I love. I think that was God's surprise for me today. But, I don't know that he trusted I would totally get it. So, he gave me a sign and confirmed it for me as I was getting ready for bed. I have been trying to read before bed instead of watching TV. In the book I picked up was the confirmation of my surprise.

I bought a new book to read a few days ago. It was written by a woman who I have a high regard for, so I just picked it up without really knowing what it was about. The subject of the book is about how women are created to crave and desire both love and rich relationships. As much as I may say that I don't crave love, I really do! I hate to admit it, but the idea of being loved for who I am totally and completely really does appeal to me. In fact, it excites and energizes me. I have a wonderful family and set of close friends. I'm thinking I need to start making more time for them. Even if they don't realize it yet, they need love just as much as I do! We all need it because the reason we were created was simply for this......To love and be loved by God. That's it! No more and no less.

I love God's surprises!

Day 1 Disappointment?

2006-02-16T09:20:00.000-05:00

Well, day 1 came and went and I am not sure if there were any so called "surprises" from God. Would you believe I actually forgot to pray the surprise me prayer until I after got to work?

Anyhow, here are some thoughts that passed through my head as the day progressed. I am a corporate recruiter for an organization that helps children and adolescents who have are severely emotionally disturbed and their families. I do not work directly with the kids, but I see them and interact with them every day.

When I think about these kids and their problems, it makes me sad. But, most of all, it makes me very angry. The majority of kids are having these issues because of how they are growing up and the culture they are living in. The inner city of Baltimore is no joke. We have an extremely high crime rate that is not improving, but is only getting much worse. These kids have so little, and most do not even have a family to help them. For the majority, the family is actually part of the problem.

These problems are so much bigger than me. I really want to help all of these kids and their communities. But, how do I start? Am I capable of even making a small difference?

Perhaps today's surprise is really a calling from God to look beyond myself and really see what goes on around me. Perhaps it is a call to action. Only time will tell. So I guess today was not a waste after all. No disappointments here. If nothing else, this experiment is teaching me to look to God much more often and to keep focus on Him.

Reality Faith?

2006-02-14T14:40:00.000-05:00

Hello Friends!

I just finished reading a new book by Terry Esau, "Surprise Me." The book is basically a diary the author keeps over a 30 day period. Each day, his only prayer is this, "Surprise me, God."

I think the book was phenomenal. So, with that in mind, I am going to take Terry's lead and try this myself.

I must confess here and now, I am a control freak. So, this "faith experiment" should not only be interesting, but also a huge challenge.

Starting tomorrow, I will take a few minutes to record my surprises here on my blog. Enjoy!

P.S.......Don't feel shy if you would like to try out some reality faith too!

God made me do it!

2005-11-03T16:10:00.000-05:00

Hello Everyone in blogville!!!!

I have contemplated starting a blog for a year or so, and have finally decided to jump in and give it a try. The reason I am doing it however is a little odd, because the reason I am doing it is God.

That's right, God made me do it. I just finished reading this cute new book named "God's Blog." Ok, so it really is not a blog, because it is a book. However, I loved the book and it inspired me to go online and start sharing some of my off the wall thoughts.

As it just so happens, I don't really have many thoughts today! So, tomorrow I will be back and hopefully then I will have something interesting to say.